As well as a pot smoking escort, I've done some travelling.
I've lived in the U.K.; been all across Europe; from France to Croatia.
I've driven from Pennsylvania to Colorado, where I lived in Boulder.
I also lived in West Palm Beach, Florida.
And then outside Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.
Once I got a taste of seeing the world and other places and cultures, I couldn't stop.
I found myself staring at a map, only to realize there was so much more to see.
I've gathered some pretty crazy stories along the way.
Mexico, is by far the most colourful and life changing.
Going to Mexico was the wake-up call i needed.
I found myself in this repetitive dark circle of self- destruction.
Looking back; I did love all the traveling, but really I was constantly trying to 'start over'.
It was August 2012; the supposed 'End of The World' was near and all I wanted was to feel alive.
The months leading up to Mexico, I was back at my parents house in Pennsylvania, broke and feeling like all my travels were someone else's life.
I had travelled alone, which although is character building, I didn't have anyone to reminisce with.
This made it all the more surreal and dream like.
My parents, were in their own hazed dark spiral at the time.
They loved America's pills; oxy contin, Xanax etc.
It wasn't just them, it was everyone in America (or so it seemed).
I don't want it to come off like I'm blaming or justifying- it was my own choice to take a pill here and there.
But it wasn't me.
I longed to be roaming the Earth.
I looked at photos and journals and craved to re-live it.
Through the Internet I heard of Ibogaine.
It sounded too good to be true.
A hallucinogenic plant from West Africa that is known to help with depression, addiction and various mental health disorders.
I have always loved and experimented with psychedelics; LSD, mushrooms and salvia.
I found them to be very life awakening and refreshed my mind and body with the reality and beauty of life.
I felt so numb and sedated, I felt this could help.
I'm obviously giving you the short version...
I'm leaving out some crazy highs and crazy lows.
I started contacting some ibogaine providers.
Since Ibogaine is a psycho- active substance it is illegal in the USA.
So, I was looking at Canada or Mexico.
I talked to a woman named Claudia, who was so understanding of my situation and assured me I would get an awakening of some sort.
She described the Village I would be living in as; a close knit community of fellow ibogaine providers and clients.
Some have gone down there to take ibogaine and ended up staying because they fell in love with the environment and people.
She had me hooked.
Once the arrangements were set; a part of me panicked and had a few days of being on pills & weed.
By the time I landed in Mexico, I was still so whacked on Xanax, I barely remember the flight.
And, upon meeting Claudia and A.J. (Another new Ibogaine client), I instantly fell asleep for the hour long drive from Puerto Vallarta into the jungle.
The first few days I stayed in this amazing beach view, Mexican oasis- coming out of a haze.
Everyone was super nice and respectful, giving me my space.
I indulged in the healthy smoothies and food, laying by the pool and bonding with A.J.
After a few days, Claudia gave me my first bit of root bark ibogaine, which is the actual bark from the plant. Soon after I began having trails and sounds were more vivid.
My hand almost moved in slow motion after itself.
A.J. Had been taking ibogaine since I arrived and now we were on the same level.
I began drawing, writing and sketching- I couldn't stop.
I felt ALIVE.
A few days later I was due for my first 'flood dose' of Ibogaine.
A flood dose is exactly what it sounds like; they flood you with ibogaine to the point where you lose sense of your motor skills, and lay in a bed while hallucinating.
My first flood was very cleansing, but not what I expected.
This massive thunderstorm had hit Mexico- and I was born in a thunderstorm.
Claudia lit an entire bedroom with candles and made the entire room white; sheets, pillows etc.
I began swallowing 20 odd capsules; some root bark, some HCL (ibogaine hydrochloride).
All the while I was writing down the changes I wanted to see in my life.
Listing goals and things I wanted to leave behind.
The ibogaine started kicking in and I sat outside on the covered porch- listening to 'New Slang' by The Shins.
With the thunderstorm almost on top of us, the rain began pouring down.
The music became background noise compared to the storm.
Most people feel this panick during storms; and sometimes I do.
But in that moment, I was so calm.
So ready and waiting for change.
Even when the power went out, as it often did, I saw it as a positive sign from some greater power or life force.
Claudia came to the side of me, grabbed my hand and asked, "you ready?"
Before the ibogaine knocked out my motor skills; I went into the candle-lit White bedroom, laid down and was given West African drum music to listen to through headphones.
Not all ibogaine providers use this drum music, but some feel it's strongly tied to the experience.
I settled into the music and waited for change.......
Part 2 coming this week!